Constructive Criticism for Website Building

As if making games isn’t hard enough, our communications guy is now forcing us to “communicate” with the world. We were putting together the first post for the site when he and I disagreed about some/most/all of the lines of text in the post. See, we wanted some text that really came at ya and brought some thunder, lighting, and delicious brownies. He felt we went a bit too far and the text was more like a drunk and/or creepy uncle filling your favorite sneakers with shaving cream.

So, in the interest of communicating with the world, here’s the conversation he and I had about the subject:

Dru says: You up for a call tonight still?
Troy says: Are you ok with skipping tonight? I’m sicker than a dog. I’m on meds kinda sick
Dru says: Yeah, fine with us. Want to meet tomorrow or we missin a week?
Troy says: Let’s pick it up tomorrow, there’s too many important things to discuss.
Dru says: okay, 6?
Troy says: Yup, sounds good.
Dru says: Awesome, I’ll try to get the social links up on the site by tomorrow. Did you get a chance to look at the about page?
Troy says: I did, the pictures are funny. A we-should-replace-those-immediately kinda funny.  The cub scouts reference cracked me up though.
Dru says: Awesome
Troy says: Even if Thinmints suck.
Dru says: WHAT THE F@%*?!
Troy says: Sorry dude, just sayin’.
Dru says: I think we should pull the high five out of the about page … or from the other post, but that’s just me. Mat says he looks stoned in his picture.
Troy says: You have like 30 high-five references on the site. I think one high-five suggests friendly. 30 high-fives suggests inappropriate touching. Mat does kinda look stoned. Is he trying for sly?
Dru says: He is.
Troy says: He needs a finger on his chin to sell that. And to smoke less pot.
Dru says: Do you still want to use a photographer? we are not opposed to this course of action at all.
Troy says: Yes, I do.
Dru says: Sweet
Troy says: We can do something fun and candid, we just need better shots in general. As for the text, I do like the guts of what you’ve got, but I’ll have some suggestions for edits.
Dru says: Sweet
Troy says: Mostly grammatical type stuff.
Dru says: Yeah, I know that isn’t the best.
Troy says: And I remember reading something about being frothy that made me say “wah?”. Hang on…
Troy says: Here it is: “…a frothing desire to make awesome games.” I’m not sure why, but that grossed me out.
Dru says: You are a sissy. You don’t like teeth shattering, you don’t like frothing. Apparently you hate imagery.
Troy says: Your mom is a sissy. Anyway, I hate imagery that hurts my teeth and/or suggests sexual moisture.
Dru says: Frothing makes me think of frothing at the mouth looking at cake.
Troy says: Because you have sex with cake.
Dru says: After American Pie I did a taste test, if you will.
Troy says: hahaha, gross! You are making me cough.
Dru says: You make me cough when you pull out lines I enjoy!
Troy says:  You are a masochist of the typed word.
Dru says: Maybe so. The teeth shattering line got a reaction from everyone we showed it to. I’m keeping that one in my back pocket for later
Troy says:  That’s a good place for it.
Dru says: I’m not like totally tied to it … I don’t really know what this sort of thing is supposed to look like.
Troy says:  That’s the good news: It needs to look however you guys want it to look. Just, you know, with things like punctuation.
Troy says: I’m not trying to kill your puppy.  I won’t be sad if you have to shatter people’s teeth, just grossed out. Your vision is what’s important.
Dru says: Ok, imagine sitting in front of your TV.
Troy says: Ok.
Dru says: …you load up the ol 360 and look around, and then you see this typewriter font that says [redacted], against a white background. You decide to load it up to see what this little mess is all about. It’s all fancy.
Troy says: I like the sound of this.
Dru says: Then all of a sudden the room starts sliding. Your lamps and shit get knocked over, just like that Maxell advertisement from the 80s. Then…
Dru says: BAM! Your teeth shatter.
Dru says:  BOOTSNAKE GAMES! I think I just wrote our 2nd post!
Troy says:  I don’t like the idea that I need to see a dentist after playing your game. It gives me a headache thinking about my teeth shattering as a result of the awesome.
Dru says: haha, I’m posting this IM conversation.
Troy says: Please don’t.

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